I dont really know if this is the right place to put this post, but basically i have suffered some pretty bad mental health issues for a few years and I thought I would come on this site to try and get some advice.

This is quite a long story so i will try and keep it as brief as i can.

My earliest recollection of any "issues" with my mental health were at approximately the age of 8 or 9. I can clearly remember looking in the mirror in my bathroom and having this stange feeling like my soul or my being was somehow separate from my body.

It’s an extremely difficult feeling to describe, but basically I felt seperated from myself and i had this horrible feeling of panic as I struggled to understand what I was feeling.

At school I was badly bullied for most of my time at school and due to this I was very paranoid about getting beat up and depressed about not wanting to leave the house etc. I feel that this had a big effect on my mental health since the period in which I felt anxious about going to school was over approximately 5-6 years.

After leaving school at 16 I had a couple of years when I felt relatively “normal”. In the back of my mind I always thought something was not quite right but I could not put my finger on it.

When I was 17 I joined the army and the training really worked wonders for my confidence. On one occasion when I was back home on leave I went to a local nightclub with my friends. While in there, my friends were taking ecstasy, and suggested I try it. I did and really did not enjoy the intensity of the drug. The next day I noticed a shift in my mental health.

Over the next few months I became more insular and found it more and more difficult to face social situations. I became more and more anxious and depressed as a result. I began having extremely vivid disturbing dreams.

I began to struggle to maintain my concentration at work since I had so much going on in my thoughts. I was sent to Sierra Leone on detachment, and while there I contracted Malaria. I was sent back to the UK for treatment and almost died. I was in an ambulance and had what I can only describe as an outer body experience. I received treatment and recovered from the Malaria after about 4 days in hospital.