or a matter of finding out what things they actually have in common. I'm not the shy type ... far from it ... but I never really got accustomed to just "hanging out" with my MiL because I didn't feel I had a lot in common with her other than her son. I had no problem with him devoting part of our trips to Alabama with her because I knew that she'd appreciate time alone with him because that was her little boy. Well, and because I just never knew what to say. Now that she's passed, a part of me wished I'd have tried harder to be friendlier to her.

explain to your wife that because you love both her and your family, it's only natural that you want them to get along, too. And that you'll do whatever you can to help foster a good relationship with them.

if she sees it from this point of view, she may try to overcome that shyness, you know?